For the crust, combine the butter, flour mix and pecans until combined. Press into a 9x13 inch pan, and bake at 325°F for about 25 minutes. Let cool.
For the filling, in a medium size bowl, combine the filling ingredients. Blend until smooth then spread over the cooled crust.
For the topping, combine the chocolate pudding package and half of the milk (1 ½ cups). Whisk until smooth, then spread on the top of cream cheese mixture. Chill in fridge for 20 minutes.
Whisk together the vanilla pudding with the remaining 1 ½ cups of milk, until smooth. Pour over chocolate topping layer and chill in the fridge for at least another 20 minutes before serving.
After the 20 minutes is up sprinkle with grated chocolate and return to refrigerator until time to serve.